February 10, 2019
God comes to each and everyone of us in different manners. Jesus shows up when we are least expecting him and calls us to a life of letting go. You may have a story to share of that very moment, or you may still be waiting for such a moment. Sister Grace, in early twenties and contemplating making final vows in her spiritual community, wondered how the women ahead of her in the formation process could be sure they were ready to make this commitment. One Saturday morning, she was discussing this with a friend who was planning to make final vows in a few months. Her friend said to her, “Have you tried asking God about this?” Grace replied, “I hadn’t thought about that,” and actually went to her room to pray. When she prayed, asking if God wanted her to make final vows, she experienced her bedroom suddenly filled with light, more than the sun streaming through the windows could account for. And she felt deeply loved by God. However, this surprisingly immediate response to her prayer and the intensity of God’s love and presence frightened her and she fled her room.
Her friend noticed her pacing one of the corridors and commented, “I thought you said you were going to pray.” Grace responded, “I did, and God is in my room right now!” Her friend asked her the next logical question, “Then what are you doing out here? Don’t you think you should go back?” Grace replied, “I’ve got enough of an answer for now!”
Jesus has been traveling around the country side healing and teaching. Luke shares some of these stories before the calling of the first disciples. He had to establish himself and build some credibility. The call to Simon comes as Jesus borrows his boat to speak to the people gathered along the lake shore. It is morning and all the fishermen were coming in after a night of work and I am sure that Simon and his group are not only tired, but also quite frustrated and angry. They did not catch a single thing while out that night. Now Jesus wants to commandeer his boat. He says yes, perhaps with a bit of reluctancy.
When Jesus instructs him to let down his nets, Simon reminds him that the night was not productive, but okay, I’ll humor you. Jesus surprises him a second time as he pulls in a net full of fish. So much fish that he must call his partners over so that they can fill their boat too! At this point, we would expect him to thank Jesus. Right? Nope! He more or less tells Jesus, “Go away Lord, get out of here! I am a sinner and not worthy of this generous gift!” Like Sister Grace, he cannot handle the presence of God and wants to get as far away as possible.
We are living in denial if we say we have never done something similar. The power and presence of God can be overwhelming! Sometimes, when we want to experience that power and God seems distant, we get even angrier and tell God to get lost for a while. This is our attempt to manage God in our lives, and let me tell you, it usually does not end the way that we want it to. “God, you may enter some parts of my life, but not that part!” However, we do not have a say where God shows up!
We must be open to Jesus showing up in the weirdest places that we would have never expected! We should not be surprised, because he did it time and time again throughout the gospels. He eats with tax collectors. He has conversations with prostitutes. He welcomes the sick and the dying. He speaks with gentiles and shows his love for them. His presence among the least of society is one we can easily witness in the gospels today. For Simon, he still probably didn’t quite know what he was getting into. However, he knows that he is a sinner and yet Jesus still wants him to follow him. First, he leaves behind the thought of that bed that he was going to get in after an unsuccessful night of fishing, and then once they make their way back to the shore, he leaves the boats of fish behind to follow Jesus. He left everything!
What is in your boat that you are being called to leave behind?
For Sister Grace, it was her doubts and her reluctance to truly invite God into her prayers. For me, it was a life of complacency where I would have been a store manager. Now, for some, that may be their calling. For me, I knew that God was calling me to something different. Something weird! It is in the weird that I found Christ calling me to something much fuller and richer that spoke to the life that God had created in me. Each of us need to find that same thing.
Jesus does not only call us, but he also equips us for the journey ahead. For Simon and the other disciples that follow him, he will teach them to be the fisher of people! He will continue to teach them and will prepare them to share the good news once his mission is complete. While we are sinners too, we also are equipped by following Jesus and his teachings. While Jesus may show up when we least expect it and calls us to let go of the worldly things in our lives, he will never leave us to carry out his message alone.
Let us pray.
Jesus, you call us to places we would never venture without your prodding. May
we be open to the Spirit empowering us to listen to where our journey may lead
 Janet K. Ruffing, Spiritual Direction, Beyond the Beginnings, pg. 37.